Shh! We're hiding. Be quiet everyone. That includes me. Shh! Who's making that noise? Oh, it's me again... (10 points to anyone who knows where that's from) No but seriously. Hide. Facebook is coming. Within past half an hour 5 people from school have whored out their Twitters on Facebook. Doomsday. Armageddon. It's been nice knowing you chaps but I fear that our story ends here.
I can't have school knowing me. Oh no. They don't know I exist on Twitter, but can you imagine if they did? I'm almost extinct on Facebook because Twitter is my home, meaning my real friends bored me so I got friendly with strangers instead. Smooth move Jones. I pour my heart out on Twitter. I get myself into trouble and I commentate during TV shows. If everyone at school latched onto me I'd be booked in for sessions with the school councillor guaranteed.
It'd feel like everyone's read my diary, because that's how I treat Twitter. I can say anything and everything and if I didn't then I'd explode. It's like there's two of me. A real life one and a Twitter one. They can't meet! You know the movies and TV shows where someone has the chance to go back in time, but they can't meet themselves because time would collapse? YES YOU DO KNOW. Well it's just like that. I can't read my tweets out loud, that's just weird. And I can't be normal me on Twitter because that would bore everyone to tears.
But I'm not saying I'm not myself on Twitter, I don't pretend to be someone else. If anything then I'm more myself on Twitter than I am in real life. I'm myself in my head in real life, like I tweet constantly in my mind.
I'm not really helping my 'not a mental' case am I?